Iza Calzado opens up on her mom’s death: ‘I don’t want to attach anything to it except truth and grief’

Trigger warning: This article mentions suicide and bipolar disorder

Iza Calzado opened up about the death of her mother, Mary Ann Ussher, in 2001.

The "Encantadia" actress guested on “Fast Talk with Boy Abunda" Tuesday where she said she first revealed her mother’s cause of death in 2019 because she was in “a better place to share it.”

Admittedly, Iza said she was initially afraid to talk about her mom dying of suicide because she didn’t want “to build a name” based on it when she was just starting her show business career. At the time, mental health wasn't also discussed openly and widely understood yet.

But now, the actress said she’s more open about her mom’s death.

“I lost my mother. She died by suicide,” she said.

“And, wow, I didn’t realize it would carry that weight still, but yeah, I don’t say it proudly,” she added. “I don’t want to attach anything to it except truth and grief, of course.”

Iza also said she’s no longer embarrassed nor afraid to talk about it.

“My mother was sick. She was bipolar. She battled with this since I was a child,” she said. “Bata pa lang ako, nakikita ko na ang laban ng nanay ko.”

“I didn’t understand [it] the way I understand now, but I had to face [my mom’s battles] day in and day out."

Iza also spoke of the difficulty when she was young and people would label her mother as "crazy."

"Mahirap pong karga 'yun kasi may shame 'yun eh, may takot at shame na kasama 'yun. Doon sa shame na 'yun, hindi ko din siya maintindihan, it was embarrassing to hear that pero now you can't even say that anymore. It's no longer politically correct. It is not human to say that."

If anything, Iza said all her life experiences combined, including her mom’s death, only made her stronger.

“Naging mas matatag ako,” she said. “Alam ko, dahil sa lahat ng pinagdaanan ko bata pa lang ako, hindi lang sa pagkamatay ng aking nanay, kung hindi sa pinagdaanan namin bilang pamilya.”

“I really chose to believe that I will do everything that I can to have a better path than my mother, whatever that takes,” she noted, adding that it takes a lot of work.

"Deliberate, conscious work and sometimes the subconscious still wins. Tao lang po ako. Lahat tayo we fight with our own demons inside. It's a war, it's a war that happens inside us, and lagi ko lang kinakapitan 'yung light 'cause we are made of light. Kaya laban talaga, laban lagi."

Iza got married to her husband, Ben Wintle, in 2018. Iza announced her pregnancy in 2022 on her 40th birthday.

She then announced the birth of her first child, Deia Amihan, in March 2023.

— Hermes Joy Tunac/CDC, GMA Integrated News