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Dingdong Dantes on fatherhood and what it's taught him about work and himself
D
ingdong Dantes is a lot of things: a prized actor, the box-office king, a navy reservist. He’s a successful businessman, a sought-after endorser, a leader of a couple of civic groups, Marian Rivera’s husband.
Of all the roles he’s come to play though, it’s being Zia and Sixto’s father that perhaps defines his life most accurately these days.
Speaking with GMA News Online at the sidelines of his recent contract renewal with GMA Network last May, Dingdong couldn’t come up with just one word to describe his life. He settled with a made-up portmanteau instead: “Dada-preneurship,” Dingdong laughs.
Good-naturedly, he explains “Dada kasi yung tawag nung dalawa sa ‘kín (The kids call me Dada),” and already fatherhood already takes precedence.
He says so much has changed since he became a father of two. “Parang 360,” he begins. “Nagbago siya sa oras ng pagtulog, sa oras ng paggising, 'yung sounds ko sa bahay, ‘Yung film list ko wala na talaga. Pagbukas ko ng TV, lahat pambata,” he shakes his head. He’s come to enjoy coloring, he adds. “Therapeutic pala siya.”
[My life has changed 360. My bedtime has changed, my wakeup time has changed. Even my music at home, and my film list have changed. When I switch open the TV, everything is for kids.]
T
eam Dantes has been a family of four for a good five years now. Dingdong and Marian Rivera got married in 2014 and became parents to Zia in 2015. They welcomed Sixto in 2019, right around the time Dingdong had his previous contract renewal with the Kapuso Network.
Incidentally, that was also the last time Dingdong spoke with GMA News Online at length. Back then, he spoke of “cannonball moments,” or life experiences that jolted awake his life purpose. He was intense, a lot serious, and severely lacking in sleep, he now says.
It was the actor himself who reminded us of that conversation, surprising us by admitting he had just reread our profile story on him. “I wanted to see if I’m still in that mindset,” he explains.
Dingdong says he's somewhat still in that mindset, but not really. "Anduon pa rin yung grit and determination but these days, I’m more relaxed,” he says. “Mas kalmado na ngayon (I'm calmer now).”
Dingdong adds he’s no longer in a hurry. He looks more comfortable too, and at ease even as he knows he’s becoming uncool in the eyes of his growing children, Zia who is nearly nine and the five-year-old Sixto. When asked what his favorite dad joke was, he shakes his head and laughs: “Makita lang nila ako, joke na (Just seeing me is already a joke for them).”
“Sobrang na-ko-cornihan sila sa ‘kin (they find me corny),” the 43-year-old actor continued, still shaking his head.
L
ike most fathers, Dingdong wants to be the cool dad, the fun dad, the parent their children will associate with play. Between him and Marian, he says his wife is more of the disciplinarian.
But with Marian being very busy with her TV comeback, “My Guardian Alien,” he’s gamely taken one of the role of being the strict parent.
He lets us in on their parenting style: “Kailangan ko maging strict dahil ako ang in charge. Kung ako naman yung busy, siya naman ‘yung strict (I need to be strict because I'm in charge. When I'm busy, Marian becomes the strict parent).”
When asked if it was something of a good cop-bad cop arrangement he has with Marian, Dingdong considers it for a moment, displaying a kind of thoughtfulness that sets him apart from the rest.
“Yes,” he begins slowly, “but most of the time, kailangan strong united front kami.”
“Maganda maging cool dad but kailangan alam ko kung kailan magiging serious. I think most importantly, andun ako parati for the kids, especially in their milestones (It's nice to be a cool dad but it's important to now when to be serious. I think it's most important to be there always for the kids, especially in their milestones).” We are bowled over by his level-headedness.
According to the actor, fatherhood has taught him so much, and especially about himself. “Akala ko, patient akong tao, pero hindi pala (I'm not that patient after all),” he says, admitting it’s impossible not to get angry when raising children. “Syempre minsan may konting bagay na hindi nasusunod, so syempre nagagalit nang konti (You don't get your way sometimes so you get angry),” he admits.
H
e's learning how to adjust himself, though. “Minsan kasi may set of standards ka na gusto pero hindi pala applicable sa lahat. So natutunan ko na dapat pala akong mag-adapt at mag-adjust sa mga bagay na hindi ko ma-control. Especially when dealing with kids and raising kids, iba na siya.”
[Sometimes, you have a set of standards but you find it's not applicable at all times so I've learned to adapt and adjust. Especially when dealing with kids and raising kids. It's a different matter]
Clearly, the role amuses him to no end. “You think you know it all, but then you have many discoveries every day,” Dingdong says of fatherhood. “Akala mo, ‘uy, OK na ito.’ Tapos hindi pala. Biglang may ituturo pa ang mga anak mo [sa ‘yo] (You think everything is OK but sometimes, your kids will teach you something new).”
His children too has given another dimension to his work. Before the pandemic, when they were much younger, Zia and Sixto would ask about his odd schedule, why he was always coming and going. “Hindi ko naman masabi I have a show, ‘Amazing Earth.’ So I [simplified] and said, ‘I’m going to the mountains to tell stories.’ So gets nila na ‘yun ‘yung trabaho.”
These days, Dingdong and Marian see to it that Zia and Sixto know what they do. “Dinadala ko na sila sa studio, sa ‘Family Feud.’ Kasama namin sila when we did a theater tour for ‘Rewind.’ So slowly nauunawaan nila what we do because intentionally, we want to show them what we are doing because we are proud of our work. We are proud of our profession,” he continues.
T
his pride and appreciation for his work was in full display last May, when he renewed his contract with GMA. It was evident in his speech, when he thanked the Kapuso bosses for the trust he’s yet again been given. It was in the GMA executives' messages to Dingdong, when they congratulated the actor not just for his hard work but for good work. It’s rubbed off on the younger actors who spoke in the many videos shown that day, expressing their desire to work with Dingdong. It’s reflected in Marian’s love and devotion to him.
Speaking to GMA News Online following a number of interviews after the festivities, Dingdong says he’s “humbled by it” all.
“I’m really grateful. Babalik-balikan ko itong araw na ito. I will always remember this day, when they entrusted me again. I will do my best to become a better performer and actor,” he said.
It was going to be another several hours of interviews before he wraps up his long, full day and head home. By then, Dingdong will have taken off his brown leather shoes, headed upstairs, and become Dada again.
If his family is still awake, they'll continue a game they’re in the middle of playing. “We were playing ‘Guess the Celebrity.’ Hinuhulaan namin yung mga local and foreign celebrities,” he says.
“May round two kami kasi natalo ako," Dingdong the cool dad revealed.
— With reports from Jade Veronique Yap/GMA Integrated News
