Heart Evangelista opens up about motherhood and losing her twins: 'Takot ako mabuntis, even if I was married'

Heart Evangelista put on a brave face on "Fast Talk with Boy Abunda" Friday and spoke about the experience of losing her twins and motherhood.

"In the beginning, having a baby wasn't a priority for me," she began.

According to Heart, she's always been trained to be a hardworking career woman of sorts. "A go-getter, hardworking no vacations. Takot ako mabuntis, even if I was married," she said.

But when she got pregnant, "I didn't realize how much I wanted it so badly," she said. 

Heart admitted that getting pregnant really changed her. "I didn't think I'd be a good mom. I didn't I wanted to be a mom," she said tearily.

"[But] even for a brief moment in my life, I realized that I can be a better person. Not necessarily that you have to give birth or to physically be a mom, but the idea of what my angels made me feel — it was good enough for me," Heart said.

When asked if she still wanted to be a mom, the Kapuso celebrity admitted she didn't know. "If I'll be a mom, why not?"

"I remember at that time, pinagdasal ko na 'find your way back to me, in any form' but for me, hindi ko na pinipilit yung mga bagay-bagay," Heart continued.

And then she said something that anybody who has ever experienced an unanswered prayer could lean on: "I don't allow myself to be heartbroken because may mga bagay na hindi binigay sa 'kin," Heart said.

In May 2018, Heart announced she was expecting. In June, she announced she had suffered a miscarriage just as they hit the three month mark.

In the interview with the King of Talk, Heart said it was right around her miscarriage that she received a call from "Crazy Rich Asians" author Kevin Kwan for a feature on Harper's Bazaar. The rest, as they say, is history. — LA, GMA Integrated News