Manix Abrera, on love and other jokes

On April 9, Manix Abrera's first Kikomachine exhibit opens in Galerie Stephanie. The series spans more than 10 books, which would mean that Abrera would need an entire building (and then some, perhaps) to house everything he has ever written. But alas, the gallery is modest in size and this pushed him to stare at his work and pick...the best?

"Ano 'yun best?" Abrera mused out loud during an interview with GMA News Online. It isn't that he can't pick because he feels like all of them are great. Quite the opposite: He's not entirely sure that any of them are exhibit-worthy. Despite what some might consider tremendous success as a "komikero" in the Philippines, Abrera keeps his head down, still afraid of the pressure that comes with fame and the fact that people can (and will) judge your work.

He doesn't talk about humility, modesty, staying grounded, et cetera—he talks about a real fear of being noticed. If you get nervous when someone's standing behind you while you're typing something, you know the exact feeling. Apparently, even when you become as successful as Manix Abrera, the anxiety stays. Great.

His worry that the work isn't good enough also helped limit the search for exhibit pieces. For "Bukal sa Puso ng Lagim" (yes, that's the title of the exhibit), he narrowed the sources down to three books—the two latest (volumes 10 and 11) and the upcoming volume in November.

"Noong tinitingnan ko 'yung mga early works ko, hindi ako sure kung exhibit worthy siya," he said with a laugh, "Walang malalim na dahilan."

Despite the seeming crippling fear, one thing pushes Abrera to make comic strips and drives him to draw a strip, a quick sketch, or a simple doodle almost daily. No drum rolls necessary, because most people are drunk on it, too. Say it with us: power of love. Topic of exhibit found!

"Feeling ko, masaya siyang topic. Tapos, maraming makaka-relate," Abrera readily answered when asked to explain his theme of choice. And it's not just Pinoys, he clarified. Love is universal, experienced by all in many forms—platonic, familial, romantic...and, yes, destructive. The last one may seem to be the main inspiration for his exhibit, but, spoilers: It isn't.

Abrera estimated that around 90% of his strips are based on reality. He unconsciously collects material from conversations with friends or strangers (crying on the train, having a fight in public, PDA-ing like there's a comet about to hit the earth), which he then twists and magnifies for optimum comedic effect.

"Noong bata kasi ako, mahilig ako sa horror," he confessed, "'Yun naman talaga hilig ko: Horror at sci-fi. Feeling ko lumalabas 'yun sa strips ko."

Sometimes, the horror of love also happens in real life. Abrera candidly shared a strange encounter in a mall during an event, "Merong isa, parang lasing siya, mapulapula 'yung mata niya—'di niya binabasa yung comics ko pero pumila siya (for my book)."

"Sa Iloilo 'to eh. Pumila siya kasi nagtataka siya kung bakit may pila," he continued, "Noong lumapit na siya sa akin—naka leather jacket siya, nakakatakot siya, parang sasapakin niya ako bigla—sabi niya, "Brad wala kasi akong kwarta pero gusto kong basahin 'tong komiks mo, pwede bang pahingi na lang?" Nakakatakot kasi talaga itsura niya, sabi ko "Sige, oo, pero secret lang." Baka saksakin niya ako sa labas kapag hindi ko binigay."

With that in mind, we continued our conversation about love and lagim.

What advice would you give to people about romantic relationships?
Importante na kilalang kilala mo ang sarili mo. Huwag mong babaguhin kung sino ka—dapat ma-accept ka niya kung sino ka. Tapos dapat siya—kung mahal mo talaga siya—ma-accept mo din siya. Titingnan mo kung ano ang pinaka-ayaw mo sa kaniya, tapos kung kaya mo 'yun na buong buhay nandun 'yun, ibig sabihin mahal mo talaga siya.

What do you think makes a relationship work?
May nag-stick talaga sa akin, 'di ko maalala kung sino ang nagsabi: Maghanap ka ng tao na mapapatawa ka. 'Yung kapag tumanda na kayo, masarap pa rin na kayo ang magkasama kasi masaya kayo sa isa't isa kahit mawala na yung romance-romance. Alam mo 'yun? 'Yung magkaibigan kayo, nagtatawanan kayo.

And what about those who have been embittered by the seeming endless wait for love?
Huwag mong hanapin, darating din 'yan. Enjoy mo lang ang buhay mo kasi marami kang pwedeng gawin sa buhay mo.

Should people stop being "bitter"?
Kaniya-kaniya naman 'yun. May nabasa ako, magandang sinabi tungkol sa art. "Art teaches you to be sorrowful"—tanggapin mo 'yung sorrow mo. Once na natanggap mo na, tsaka ka makakalutang. Kapag hindi mo natanggap na malungkot ka, deny ka lang ng deny, hanggang doon ka na lang. Pero kapag natanggap mo na "tangina, bad trip 'to!", lulutang ka na ulit. Nasa sa iyo 'yun kung bitter ka talaga. Lilipas dan 'yun.

How much love do you get from your fans?
Minsan may mga letters na parang high school pa lang sila nagbabasa na sila (ng Kikomachine). Parang nakakatakot nga eh. Sobrang nagpapasalamat ako sa kanila...tapos after that, inaalis ko na sa isip ko kasi, yung nga, tuwing gagawa ako na-pre-pressure ako kahit ilang taon ko na siya ginagawa. Pressured na pressured ako tuwing magsisimula ako ng bagong strip, so kailangang, as much as possible, i-blanko ko isip ko. Iniisip ko lang: Wala, walang magbabasa nito. Walang may pakialam dito.

How can people ignite a passionate love affair with Pinoy comics?
Punta kayo sa mga comic conventions, tapos tingnan niyo talaga 'yung mga independent na mga comics na lumalabas ngayon. Ang dami, dami, dami, dami. Tapos super ganda. Ang daming mas maganda pa sa published na. Ang wild na ng mga kwento. Tapos ang dami ng channels—pwede kang mag-Facebook, mag-Instagram...ilagay mo sa website mo. Ang dami mong mahahanap na komiks. Kaya hindi totoo yung mga sinasabing namatay na ang comics. Kahit sino pwedeng gumawa at ang daming mong nakikitang bagong kwento.

How much do you love your work?
Swerte lang ako kasi ginagawa ko 'yung gusto ko. Kahit awayin ako ng lahat, kahit hindi siya bumenta, kahit okrayin ng lahat...okay lang kasi mahal ko itong ginawa ko. Maswerte lang ako na nagagawa ko siya. Bonus na lang lahat yan kapag may natuwa. Hanggang ngayon takot talaga ako.

Hirap na hirap akong mag-exhibit kasi ako mismo, hindi ako sure kung okay ba ito. Tuwing gumagawa ako ng strips, 'di ko iniisip na may magbabasa nito. Nakaka-pressure. Kapag alam mong may titingin, hindi ka makagawa. Kapag gumagawa ako, dapat trip ko yung ginagawa ko. Ngayong i-e-exhibit, ako mismo iniisip ko, "Shet, okay ba ito? Ang kapal ko naman." Ito 'yung mga totoong feelings ko na corny pakinggan pero totoo naman.

Should people do what they love, even when it's impractical?
From the start, winarningan ako ng tatay ko na kung gusto mo talagang karirin ang pagkokomiks mo, isipin mo talaga na struggle 'yan. Tapos hindi mo siya gagawin dahil sa pera, gagawin mo dahil gusto mo siya. So naka-mindset talaga ako na gusto ko talaga siya. Kung may times talaga noon na wala akong pera, kailangan kong rumaket, kailangan kong maghanap ng ibang trabaho. Pero never kong bibitawan. Basta lagi siyang nandiyan. Kumbaga, part na siya ng system ko.

Siguro 'yun 'yung formula ko: Lagi siyang nandiyan, 'di ko siya bibitawan. Kung kailangan kong gumawa ng ibang bagay, sige gagawa ako ng iba. Gagawa ako ng labada para masustentuhan ko 'to. — TJD, GMA News

Strips used with permission from Manix Abrera. "Bukal sa Puso ng Lagim" opens on April 9 at Galerie Stephanie (Unit 1B Parc Plaza Bldg., 183 E. Rodriguez Jr. Ave., Libis, Quezon City.